Every couple of minutes that go by in The Munsters, any audience member who happens to be paying attention might ask the age-old question "who is this for?" The answer, for better and for worse, is that this film was made entirely for Rob Zombie, who clearly had a lot to work through.
Rob Zombie is a singular talent. As a musician, as a stage presence, and as a film director, he's the only game in town for fans of his unique style. But, as he's proven multiple times, he's not a jack of all trades. The Munsters isn't exactly his typical feature, but in many ways, it's just as hard to watch.
Most people have an idea of what The Munsters is about. A family of classic Universal monsters moves into an otherwise normal world, and hijinks ensue. This 2022 film is, bizarrely, a prequel that explores the initial courtship between Herman and Lily and their journey to America. Lily, the daughter of Count Dracula, is having a terrible time in the dating scene. Everything changes when she sees Herman, a freshly built Frankenstein's monster with the brain of a dim stand-up comedian. It's love at first sight, though the Count doesn't approve. From there, it's one comedic vignette after another as the happy couple goes from dating to honeymoon to buying their first home. It's a simple structure, but don't worry, there's enough chaos in the execution to keep viewers confused.
As a work of adaptation, The Munsters is not a compliment to the dubious legacy of the 1964 series. All 70 episodes are available now on Peacock, anyone feeling the pang of nostalgia for America's (second?) favorite family of monsters can go watch the entire series now. Despite coming out almost sixty years ago, the show looks far better than the film. The show's black and white look is iconic, its set design is timeless, and its practical effects are charming. The film uses comical VFX, well below the quality of countless solid YouTube series. It's horrible to look at in a way that the show could never have dreamed of. Worst of all, the show is consistently and effortlessly funnier than the film.
Rob Zombie isn't a comedian, but he is a hardcore lifelong fan of the series that inspired this film. Surely someone who named his biggest hit after the family's car would be able to understand the nuts and bolts behind its comedy. The jokes have a hit rate of around 10%. Most of the gags are either grimly unfunny on the first try or beaten into submission by over-eager adherence to the rule of three. Zombie wrote this film, so the jokes that fall flat are his responsibility. Part of the problem is the pacing. Not just the curious lack of comedic timing, but the length of the film. Perhaps 25 minutes was the correct length for a Munsters story because a film that lasts around four times as long is punishing. Based on the evidence provided in this movie, it is very difficult to know exactly what Rob Zombie loved so much about the series.
There is clearly passion on display in this film, but its microbudget, non-stop bizarre creative choices and complete lack of charm bury it before it can fly. The performances are a mixed bag. The entire main cast consists of Zombie's regulars. Rob Zombie's wife Sheri Moon Zombie appears in every film he makes, and she makes a fine Lily Munster. Jeff Daniel Phillips appears as Herman, who spends way too much time delivering hacky stand-up and not enough time doing Buster Keaton gags. Daniel Roebuck appears as the Count, bringing a distinctly Svengoolie performance to the role. Speaking of horror hosts, the one and only Mistress of the Dark, Cassandra Peterson makes a welcome appearance. Richard Brake is a standout, as always, in the role of the scientist who built Herman. Not a lot of other performers appear, possibly due to budget, but also possibly owing to pandemic concerns.
There's so much wrong with The Munsters, but it is a unique experience. Fans of the original series may get something out of it beyond the average viewers. Rob Zombie completionists will likely be on the edge of their seats. Honestly, if there's one primary joy that can be taken away from the film, it's watching a man finally get to leave his mark on a property that influenced him. Not every fan can make their own version of the thing they love. On the other hand, the brand has sat dormant for decades, while The Addams Family has enjoyed one reboot after another. If it makes the viewer happy to see Herman and Lily again after all these years, then the film has merit to them. Frankly, this is the kind of bad movie that still rewards the viewer to see. It's like watching the Dragula flip, crash, burn and explode.
The Munsters is available now on Netflix.