The day of lovers is almost upon us.  Surprise!  For most men, this obviously means it’s time to scramble for a Hallmark card and a cheap, plastic rose from the gas station.  Forget it, guys; she won’t be impressed. Your plan will fail and you’ll be in the dog house for a week.

Why men are compelled to do this year on year is not entirely clear, but Sony is tackling this issue head-on, by providing gamers with Valentines Day-themed downloads on the PlayStation Store.

Now, Sony isn’t exactly famous for having their finger on the pulse when it comes to marketing and PR.  In fact, some could argue that they are the ambassadors of fail when it comes to advertising their own products to their own customers.  So when a promotional email from them arrived in our inbox stating, “Watch enchanting romantic comedies, heartfelt dramas and playful misadventures in love-and make it chocolate, flowers and movies this February.  Starting at $2.99.” we were somewhat impressed.

That’s right, Sony is offering all you slackers an alternative to cheap bent cards and a $2 Whitman’s Sampler:  buy some cheap romantic movies from the PlayStation Store instead, and receive a +10 Romance buff to the character sheet of yourself.

But slow down there, because Sony didn’t hit a home run on this one.  Sony loves to drop some street on us from time to time to show us that they are still cool.  The movie selection is broken up into movies “for the lovers” and movies “for the players”.  As you’d guess, movies “for the lovers” are soft, heartfelt romantic movies for ladies, such as Love Happens, Couple’s Retreat, Juno and Sleepless In Seattle; and movies “for the players” are the for the Spike TV crowd, such as I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell, American Pie Presents: The Book Of Love, The Hangover and Wedding Crashers.

Here’s the best part, and I strongly recommend you don’t take them up on this offer: Sony is inviting you to “…spread the love with these special Valentines Day gaming picks”, and aside from a couple of good offerings, such as the LitteBigPlanet Valentine Mini-Pack and Braid, you can also download “A Sexy Valentine Theme”, and… wait for it… Fat Princess!  So take it from me, if you buy your significant other Fat Princess on Valentines Day, you’ll be spreading that love all on your own.

Now, as a king amongst lovers, I don’t need Sony’s help getting my swerve on,  but if you need a little romantic bolstering, check out the ad here.