For a show to have survived for as long as It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia has, it needs a couple of things. The first and arguably most important of these is a colorful cast of characters, which is something that the series has been able to boast about since the very beginning. A lot's changed since then, but many of the flaws that punctuate the core characters' personalities still remain, including Mac's insecurities and his unquenchable thirst for acceptance.
Though each of the gang is insecure in their very own way, Mac figuratively and literally takes the cake. From his constant need to be seen as a physical powerhouse to his near-endless attempts to earn Dennis' acceptance, much of his life is built around the false image of himself that he's been cultivating over the years. This has naturally led to some fantastic quotes from the character, the best of which can be found below.
7 "All of my instincts and my training tell me to use this as a weapon." (S06E04)
When Mac wins a radio phone-in and a chance to win a weekend at an exclusive clubhouse, he's understandably quite excited. In order to win, however, he'll need to make a hockey shot from the halfway line, which isn't ideal given his complete lack of experience with the sport. Thankfully, Charlie is on hand to help out and agrees to teach him how to handle a hockey stick, though, in true Mac-style, he'd rather use it as a weapon instead.
Mac often talks a big game when it comes to his martial arts background, but, in reality, he has no formal training nor even the slightest hint of aptitude for hand-to-hand or armed combat. In this instance, Charlie chooses not to call him on his bullsh*t and just gets on with the lesson, though Dee and Dennis regularly challenge Mac when it comes to some of his larger-than-life claims.
6 "Not gay sex." (S04E02)
If Archer has taught the world anything, it's that phrasing can be very important. Apparently, Mac never got the memo though, as he finds himself having to backtrack while revealing one of his plans during a season 4 episode. He talks about "oiling up asses" and "plowing" before making an unfortunate fist gesture, which confuses the rest of the gang quite a bit. To his credit, Mac realizes his mistake soon enough and is quick to clarify that he didn't mean gay sex despite what it may have sounded like.
This isn't the only time when Mac gives off unintentional gay vibes either, with one of the more memorable instances of him doing so coming in season 3 when Charlie, Mac, and Dennis are designing a flyer to invite "cool guys" to their "party mansion." Though the final flyer does stress several times that there's "nothing sexual" involved, the fact that the bicep shape they chose for the flyer looks more like male genitalia sends something of a mixed message.
5 "I talk to a priest. He lets me off the hook. I move on." (S10E03)
When the gang's old high school friend Psycho Pete shows up at the bar, Mac and Charlie get into a discussion about therapy. Instead of talking to a therapist and actually having to deal with his issues head-on, Mac reveals that he'd much rather confess his sins to a priest and have them instantly forgiven. For those wondering, this really is how Mac thinks that confession works, as evidenced by a season 7 episode from a few years prior.
In said episode, Mac decides to visit a priest to tell him the story of how his friends made him fat, and then asks the priest to smite them for having done so. Eventually, the clergyman gets fed up with listening to Mac's asinine ramblings and agrees to forgive him and condemn the rest of the gang. This incident could perhaps give viewers some indication as to where Mac's ignorance of his own religion's traditions really come from, though there are plenty of similar situations that do so as well.
4 "Science is a liar sometimes." (S08E10)
Mac's poor understanding of Catholicism is often used as a source of humor on the show, particularly in some of the earlier seasons. One of the more memorable examples of this can be found in season 8, when Mac interrupts Dennis and Frank's mock trial to make an argument against Darwin's theory of evolution. Rather than tackling the issue directly though, he once again takes a more indirect approach.
By pointing out some of the mistakes made by a few of history's most influential scientists, he's able to sell the idea that "science is a liar sometimes" to Dee, Frank, and Charlie. Granted, none of them fully commit to accepting the idea that evolution isn't real, but that they're willing to put themselves on the fence is impressive nonetheless and easily one of Mac's finest accomplishments during the show's fifteen seasons on the air.
3 "I want the bad guy to be different from me so I know why I hate him." (S14E02)
Focus groups can be a great way of refining an idea and ensuring that it performs well with the target audience. Of course, this only holds true if those chosen to be in the group aren't certifiably insane. Sadly for the producers of Thundergun 4: Maximum Cool, they end up with the gang in their group, which leads to some terrible suggestions that completely destroy the movie. That said, a few of these ideas are actually quite funny.
The pick of the bunch is arguably Frank's suggestion that the villain should be a person of color rather than a white man. Mac is quick to jump in and stress that this really isn't "a racial thing," but instead a matter of opposites because he hates people who are different from him. This apparently extends to foreigners and people with accents as well, which, in hindsight, explains a lot of his actions in earlier seasons of the show.
2 "I did an ocular patdown and I cleared him." (S05E02)
In reality, he's one of the most cowardly members of the gang, but Mac still likes to think of himself as the group's protector. When presented with the opportunity to come up with a fake persona for himself, he regularly chooses to be a bodyguard and often refers to himself as the head of security at Paddy's Pub. He has a few different techniques for detecting trouble, but the most infamous of these is undoubtedly his "ocular patdown."
First revealed early on in season five, Mac has used this technique on numerous occasions over the years. It sounds impressive at first, but once it becomes clear that he's only really looking at people to assess whether they may pose a threat, it suddenly becomes a lot less grand. What's more, the first person that he uses the technique on ends up stealing Dee's car after being "cleared," suggesting that, unlike Country Mac, he's not actually that good at carrying out these ocular patdowns either.
1 "I'm cultivating mass." (S07E01)
Rob McElhenney spent five months tacking on mass for the show's seventh season, jumping from 160 pounds to a dangerously high 212. The main reason for doing this was that he thought it might make the Mac character even funnier if he were fat, and most viewers would probably agree that it did. In particular, the extensive collection of Cartman-like instances in which Mac insists that he isn't fat are the clear highlights, though the scene in which he's wheezing while eating isn't too far behind.
The actor was able to shed the excess mass remarkably quickly after filming for the show's seventh season wrapped and arguably looked a lot better than he did when he started once all was said and done. While the weight may have disappeared quite quickly though, fat Mac lives on in memory having helped to make It's Always Sunny's seventh season one of the very best in the series' long and hilarious history.