Gears of War 3 may be an incredible game, but despite all its gaming merits, it can have the tendency to bring out the worst in us all. Have you ever stopped to consider just how oddly similar playing Gears online is to something like say… binge drinking with your friends? You haven’t, but you’d like me to lay it down for you? Certainly, this is exactly the kind of altruistic soul searching this comic strip was created for.

First of all, most players are doing it before they’re of age. Just like a sweaty-palmed sophomore in high school who’s wondering whether or not the clerk at the liquor store is going to notice that he wasn’t born during the Roosevelt administration like his ID would suggest, squeaky-voiced adolescents are immersing themselves in all things M-Rated and mowing down waves of Locust like war-hardened vets. Secondly, isn’t the language used by someone who’s had three Four Lokos too many about the same as what you hear on Xbox Live? In both cases, talk is often slurred and unintelligible, about thirty decibels too high and obscene enough to make you feel both offended and ashamed at the same time.

Long nights of drinking often result in foul smells. Same goes with long nights of gaming. Long nights of drinking often find your wallet a lot emptier than when you started. Same thing can happen with games and DLC. Long nights of drinking often result in an argument with a close friend that goes from hatred to angry tears to remorseful tears. Same goes with gaming. Long nights of drinking leave you light headed, red-eyed and likely to miss work the next day. Same goes for… you get where I’m going with this.

And finally, with both drinking and gaming, one has to walk that fine line of “just enough but not too much” to ensure that the opposite sex still finds them attractive. Cue rimshot.

You can grab some pals and go on a Gears of War 3 bender right now, but please be responsible. Corrupted Saves cares.

Comic by Zac Landry.

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