New 'Duke Nukem Forever' Videos Are Not April Fools Jokes

Duke Nukem Forever What Would Duke Do Jetpack

There's no doubt that the recent delay in Duke's fateful return to gaming was not what gamers who've been waiting 14 years wanted to hear. Gearbox President Randy Pitchford's own remark, "it's not even April Fools," in the trailer that revealed Duke Nukem Forever's final delay was the real nail in the coffin that let gamers know this was no trick.

Now that it is April Fools Day, what does Duke Nukem Forever have to offer us? How about a couple of gameplay trailer that show the Duke doing things that no ordinairy human would. What may come as a surprise is that much like the delay videos, these are also not Aprils Fools gags. The gameplay featured in these "What Would Duke Do" videos is actual footage from the game.

We really can't state this strongly enough: these Duke Nukem videos are intended for mature audiences only. Seriously. NSFW!


For the first installment, "What Would Duke Do: Jetpack," we get a glimpse at how Duke would take a jetpack from the alien scum wearing it.


If that didn't disgust you, then maybe Gearbox and former developer 3D Realms haven't been trying hard enough with Duke Nukem Forever. Or maybe they're just saving worse for another video. We'll let you decide after you watch "What Would Duke Do: Holy $%&*#."


Maybe we shouldn't be surprised. After all, we did see this coming. The ESRB ratings summary for Duke Nukem Forever released early last month did warn us that players would be able to pick up feces from toilets and throw it against the walls. Putting an indigested piece of corn in the stool was a nice touch that really emphasises the grotesque nature of this object. Duke's own fourth wall breaking objections to the act are what really make doing it funny.

Thankfully, both videos remind us that we should wash our hands after playing this filthy game. Personally, I recommend a shower with a thorough scrub.

These two videos might give Fox News even more ammunition against the upcoming shooter. The news giant recently reported that the game featured a multiplayer mode that allowed players to slap women. The multiplayer mode features Duke capturing girls instead of flags and dealing with their attempts to escape by slapping the girl's buttocks. Pitchford responded by explaining that the "love tap" that Duke gives the ladies' behinds as he's carrying them away is just that, and that the Capture the Babe multiplayer mode is still going to remain in the game.

What do you think of the two new videos 2K Games has brought us? Are you going to be throwing feces like a chimp in a rage, or will you be maintaining a more civil stance to Duke Nukem Forever by just blowing up everything in sight?

Duke Nukem Forever's fateful release was pushed back to June 14, 2011, in North America, and June 10, 2011 everywhere else for the PC, PS3, and Xbox 360.

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